I have been an artist my whole life…
Just before Christmas I spontaneously had an urge to craft myself a dreamcatcher over the holiday period. It became my Christmas project. Dreamcatchers and their folklore is something I was always fascinated by when I was younger and I even made my first huge one for my A-level art exam.
This time I wanted to do something a bit different and so foraged for a branch, sanded and oiled it with coconut oil and created a series of dreamcatchers each with different web designs, to hang above my bed. It also features a pouch to hold a gemstone and a painted disc featuring a quote around the perimeter. I decided to forego feathers and leather so that this installation is entirely vegan- my own personal twist on tradition.
For those of you who've come to know me only in recent years as I began this blog, you've likely never seen this side of me. Un-bridled, un-suppressed artistic creation simply for the sake of creation and nothing more.
I would draw, paint, model, saw, solder, collage, print, weave and sculpt pretty much anything and everything I could get my hands on from the tiny delicate collages to huge larger-than-life sculptures. It was the manifestation of my energy within.
Most of that was half my lifetime ago now… during my school and college years, both in and out of the classroom, when freestyle imagination was encouraged to the absolute max, when nothing needed to have a purpose or a monetary value and I wasn't restrained with the notion of making a living from my creations.
This came to mind last week as I commence a deep clean in my house, sorting through cupboards and shelves that hold many of these treasures and coming to terms with 'letting go'. Many of my pictures and collages are wrapped up to protect them, created then immediately packaged away, which saddens me. Other artworks adorn the walls of my house and those of relatives, this makes me happy as the joy continues to shine it's light every day.
I put my heart and soul into each and every one of my creations, immersing myself in the mind-body connection and allowing my energy to free-flow into physical life.
Today I finally acknowledge that I need to let go. It's been a long time coming. I need to emotionally let go of many of these artworks that are hidden away collecting dust, and the many tools and materials I had stashed away alongside 'just in case' I needed them.
Most of all, I need to let go of the notion that I am no longer an artist. I AM an artist and will always be so. The artist within me now simply manifests itself in a different form.
To honour this process and as a reminder to myself of where I have come from and of the creative sparks that still live strongly within me, I share a little insight to my past. I don't have photos of some of my best work, but this was my A-level art as a mini montage half my lifetime ago...