Posts tagged mindset
How you do one thing is how you do everything...

A week or two ago a created a unique new package... something I didn't initially talk about on here directly because it relates heavily to my design work, but actually now as I reflect upon it more I realise how much it has to do with my coaching work - it's all about connection!

The new package I have just launched is 'The Visibility Package' 

(as showcased on my design website)

In my work as a health and mindset coach, I meet so many inspiring 'wellness-focused' people who have an incredible passion and a powerful mission that I know could help so many... yet their voice and online presence is struggling to be seen and heard above the noise.  Finding ways of powerfully sharing their message, the feels in alignment with who they are, is crucial! (I know from experience!)

the visibility package coaching design blogging

I was talking to a friend about the package yesterday, getting quite animated and excited as I talked, when from out of nowhere these words came out of my mouth...

"you have to connect with yourself to be able to connect with your client" *

...and there lies the truth, the fundamental principle that I am so passionate about as a coach.

In the wellness industry (or really just as regular people on our own personal journey) there is so much competition. But what really, truly, deeply sets you apart on your journey is your ability to rise above the noise and above the superficial to reach out and really connect with your people, your community, your tribe, your clients (*insert most relevant word for you there) BUT in order to do this, you first need to connect with yourself!

A massive part of The Visibility Package AND as I have begun to realise, my coaching work as a whole, is about digger deeper into your own story - you passion and drive but also the messiness and the struggles too. Really owning that.

Yes I know that might sound deep, and you might be thinking...   "but I just have a regular life, nothing special" ...well, actually no you don't.

I have often heard it said that...

"how you do one thing is how you do everything"

...and there's is your second truthbomb. Having an awareness of your actions, walking your talk and really owning and believing your message to the world speaks volumes. Your people will hear it and feel it. I promise.

So at it's core this is what my work as a coach is about, connecting to your deepest sense of self. I am reading a great book at the moment called 'The Highest Goal' by Michael Ray, and it's very similar to what he talks about.

I was going to leave this post here... with two 'truthbombs' for you to sit with and process, but then I figured i'd add the final section that was part of the note I sent out to my mailing list last night...

So now in the spirit of playfulness and curiosity, I have a game for you. Pick ONE of these three options below:

1) You're NOT interested in The Visibility Package but would love to have a conversation about what a deeper connection with yourself would mean for your life... hit reply and let me know where you are at!

2) You ARE interested in learning more about the package (there are two spots already confirmed, and more conversations booked for next week)...
hit reply and let me know asap why you are interested and we'll arrange a time to call/Skype. 

3) You're kind of skimming this post, not really interested in any of it, but these bullet points caught your eye ;-) Then do me (and you) a favour and take a few moments this weekend to have a think about how you are showing up in your world right now, are there some tweaks you could make to bring yourself more into alignment?

So which will it be for you? ;-)

mission DTFT 2.jpg

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That time I learnt to drop kick a football…
 

Years ago… and I’m talking about 15 years ago! I asked my then boyfriend teach me to drop kick a football. I was never a ‘girly’ girl, always running around with the guys and so I would get frustrated when out for a walk and a wayward ball from a group of kids rolled across my path. 

I wanted to get over that awkward moment of lamely trying to kick it back or picking it up and throwing it, only for it to land a few metres in front of me (even worse!) So I figured if I learnt to properly drop kick a ball I would be challenging norms (a girl knowing how to kick a ball really well!) feel a little bit smug, and avoid all awkwardness in the process… a total win-win-win.

So then it began. 

Pretty much every weekend for weeks (or maybe even months) I spent hours out on the playing field on a Sunday afternoon learning how to drop kick a football. My poor boyfriend patiently helping me. As you can imagine there was a lot of running after balls. Now, anyone who knows me well, also knows how stubborn I can be. This was particularly pronounced in my younger years when I was less able to deal well with this personality trait and it would result in a lot of tantrums ;-)

However, I did get pretty good at kicking that ball!

But when I look back now I wonder how well that actually served me. Sure, being ambitious and driven to achieve a goal (pun unintended!) can be a very good thing, but the focus on enjoying the journey towards it is something that is now so much more important to me and one I had never even considered at the time. I didn’t particularly enjoy the journey of learning to kick that ball, and once i’d nailed it I didn’t maintain the practice, so the skill quickly slipped away again.

We can be so caught up in a ‘future focused’ mindset of reaching the end goal, that we totally forget to consider at the outset how we might feel throughout the process it takes to get there- a process which may take months or even years. Then, as we all too often see, when we do reach that goal it might not even be what we quite wanted or expected anyway.

Over very recent months and years my relationship to goal-setting has changed significantly. I tend to use the word ‘intentions’ rather than ’goals’, which for me has more freedom, feels more heart-centred and less head dominated. Something to work towards with a deeper appreciation and awareness for each present moment, opening myself to opportunities that may cross my path that I may have otherwise been blind to.

So where are you at with your goals or ambitions? 
Do they also serve you and along the way? 


Dream bold, dream big… but simply remember to check back in with your heart in the process.


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A Mantra for Monday no. 3

"It's All About The Hyphen...Life! Of course. Reverend Ruth proclaimed it so this very morning on't radio show. Birth date, deceased date. And the piddly little hyphen in the middle, so understated. That IS life".

(extract taken from Chris Evans blog-Radio Two 11.01.12)

I heard this comment as I was in the car, on one frosty winter morning last week trundling along my usual route to work.  The radio was on low volume, I was only half listening as I drove along on autopilot.

These words caught my attention. They brought me back to reality. They made me laugh out loud with the irony.

I just really love the irony in the fact that the enormity of life can simply be summed up in the smallest and most insignificant ‘mark’. Don’t let the brackets surrounding your life, the brackets that mark your time here on earth, define you. Make your mark count!


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A Mantra for Monday no.2

I love to dream, to slip off into my fantasy world where everything is possible and I can be whoever I want to be.  But, I forget that I can actually be whoever I want to be. It all within my own control...and your own control. This is easier said than done, I know, and believe me I suffer the same crises of confidence as everyone else!

The difference between dreaming and doing is often courage. Courage to face our fears, courage to go against expectation, courage to take the risk….. This links back to my previous post on being in charge of your own experiences. I believe the bridge between impossible, improbable and inevitable is thinking it through and takingthe steps to make it happen.

Something like this:

‘Impossible’: lots of thoughts and dreams swimming around your mind in their own little happy existence safe with no contextual reality.

‘Improbable’:  you refine your dreams and ideals through giving them a context in real life. It is still all in your head and there is still no commitment, but a greater sense of the logistics and meaning within your own life. You begin to ask yourself the deeper questions.

So far so good….all nice and simple….safe and comfortable.

The jump to the inevitable?  Commitment.

‘Inevitable’:  for me, this involves making the change from mind to reality. Putting it out there for others to see and proclaiming your 'commitment'. This is not necessairly as scary as it sounds. Break it down and take small steps.

  • Talk through your ideas with a friend. Talking about an idea immediately makes it more real and also enables you to gain extra support through others.
  • Sign up- join the club/society/dating website or whatever it might be. You don’t need to launch yourself into the scene right away but simply signing up gives you that initial boost and gives yourself physical proof that you are committed- plus once you’ve had a 'look around' is it really that scary?
  • Write it down- sounds odd? I write all my thoughts down, in particular things I find overwhelming or confusing. I often find that simply through writing something down a greater sense of clarity is achieved naturally. You find the ability to answer your questions and justify your own reasoning in a logical way. Write when you are in a positive mindset and refer back to your notes when your confidence in yourself wavers.

There are many other ways that commitment can be manifested, but I just wanted to highlight that commitment isn’t a scary word and it isn’t the deal breaker it often seems to be. It is not finite and it doesn’t mean that there is ‘no going back’. It is simply a confirmation to yourself along the pathway towards your dream…so that it can soon become the inevitable.


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Introducing: ‘Silent Sunday’ and ‘A Mantra for Monday’

Did I mention I was gonna shake things up a little?

Well, I am!

“I live for a challenge, I never sit still and I never stop thinking”

These words are taken from my ‘about page’. I think a lot…maybe too much, often ending up going round in circles! However, I know that in order to really find out who I have the capacity to become I must never stop thinking…doing…trying…challenging…being...living!

Writing things down helps crystallise your thoughts.  It helps make sense of any confusion and put things into perspective. I also love words.  I love the way that a combination of a few words has both the capacity to make you laugh out loud or sob uncontrollably. Incredible.

I also love photography. It is a skill which I really want to progress, and I don’t simply mean in relation to food (although that is a great outlet for practice). I love the fundamental emotional connection brought about through imagery without the use of words- a total contrast. Two extremes…not like me at all! (hmm…or maybe just a little!!)

So, I had an idea….

Every Sunday I will post a photo. That is all, just a photo. No words. These will be photos that I have taken at any time and place and that for whatever reason resonate with me and connect with my emotions. Without words the imagination has free reign open to all interpretation.

Hence, this will become Silent Sunday.

Inspiration for this concept and the subsequent title of my post was found here. The blog had been hosting a linked ‘Silent Sunday’ for a number of months before the linked element was removed. My own thoughts had already been heading in a similar direction when I happened to chance upon her blog and the eloquence of the title Silence Sunday appealed such that I found I couldn’t better it.

Following Silent Sunday’s pure and simple round up to the week, I wanted to offer something of a contrast to kick start Monday morning. Start as you mean to go on…so they say! If that’s the case, the opportunity to fill my mind with a positive thought to carry me through the week seemed particularly fitting.

Hence, this will become A Mantra for Monday.

It is difficult to know how these ideas will pan out over the course of time. It's unknown territory...spontaneous...crazy. I have no visions or expectations but I am simply open to the paths my mind may take me. I cannot promise this will work, and if it falls by the wayside then…well at least I can say I gave it a go!  In the meantime I hope you will also join me in this new chapter… your thoughts and comments will help turn this into something special.

….Oh, and don’t worry, there will still be plenty of food! I do love cake, after all, …and that definitely hasn’t changed!

I simply want to focus on a more holistic sense of wellbeing, and in doing so do more of the things that make me most happy and that give a sense of fulfilment and perspective. 

I hope I can share that with you too.


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Struggling With Life

Ok, I’ll be honest… these last few days have been hard.  Everything is ‘up in the air’ and change is all around me right now.

Why?

The ‘Boy’ who has played a major guiding role in opening my eyes and redirecting my life over this past year, is no longer my boy. It was a mutual decision to call it a day. 

Food was always such a big part of our life together and I gained so much happiness in creating recipes for us to try and then seeing the joy on his face when I’d succeeded. For these last few days food has been the last thing on my mind. In actual fact, even if I’d wanted to get stuck into something I haven’t been able to since all my baking ingredients have only just moved out with me and are yet to be unpacked. The previous post on ‘peanut soup’ was a recently written back-up post that I kept in reserve for an emergency situation (this counts as an emergency-right?) 

It all just feels a little surreal at the moment, I guess my ‘reason’ for doing what I do suddenly seems somewhat meaningless when you’re not ‘in it together’. In the beginning the Boy gave me a reason for it all, the meals we shared together the naughty but healthy snacks I could make him, to nurture and look after him. He was a willing participant and allowed my happiness and skills to grow. That meaning is now gone.  My curiosity is still there, but I feel resentment and discord… why try and make the effort when there is no one else to really appreciate the outcomes? It just feels empty.

Oh poor me…sob sob sob!  NO!  

On a more serious note I know it will all be fine, this is far from a ‘sob story’ and I am not one to to dwell and mope for long. I am only writing about this to give you a greater understanding as to why there might be a few changes around here as I find my way on my own… or should I say on my own terms… it’s all down to me now!

So I guess I just need to suck it up and get a grip!!

I know it will settle in time and that I’ll have my ups and down just like the everyone else, I also know that I’ll find a new way to re-create this meaning in my life and for the people around me, and hopefully find more people like me and maybe enlighten a few of those closer to home. Most importantly I know full well that in order to have healthy treats I’ll have to make them myself… a life without treats… no thank you!!

 So, you see I can’t just stop even if I wanted to!!  Just watch this space…..

 

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